It’s that time of year to check in with myself. In January, I chose “abide” as my word for 2016, and I have been “abiding” and waiting, and generally procrastinating about some things.
I guess I’ve procrastinated about a lot of things, but seriously, I have been living *in* some questions that have been running around in my brain for a good little while.
I guess about five or six years ago, I had a tug in my head, a little voice that kept whispering that I needed to change my career or at the very least change my venue. Circumstances stepped in, and there were some major changes in career and venue. But still, there was a nagging voice that whispered that there should be “more.”
I thought I could be a “people” photographer—custom portrait sessions, senior sessions, engagements. . . . You know, the kind that so many “moms with cameras” seem to be able to do and to make a living at. The market is small, though, and there seems to be a photographer on every corner, and I just plain didn’t know what to do. I set that dream aside.
Instead, I signed up for classes, and I spent some time learning Photoshop, and I played with my camera, and I still play with my camera. And I realize that I enjoy photographing things other than people, although I do enjoy “people” photography now and again. In fact, next week, I’m going to be up to my ears in people photography at Vacation Bible School. We’re making a video of images that I take for the closing.
But I’m still not there yet. My dream is reframing itself again. I “met” Teresa Robinson, the Stargardener, online through her Right Brain Planning website and Facebook group. She is becoming a mentor to help me sift through these dreams of mine. Here it is: I want to encourage people, especially women like me who have grown up thinking that they “can’t” be creative or artistic because ________. I’ll let you fill in the blank. I grew up in a family of practical people. When I wanted to major in English because I loved literature and writing, my mother encouraged me to become a teacher. I had to be practical. Now, don’t get me wrong. That teaching career has served me well over the last thirty-six years! But now that I am semi-retired and part-time, I want “more.”
So, still putting my dreams and my goals “out there” into the universe: I want to teach people/women/children/children-at-heart how to be creative every single day.
This is going to take some major reframing and some major stepping out of my comfort zone.